The Leaders We Deserve

Osama bin Laden once warned al Qaeda not to target Joe Biden because he believed that his inheriting the presidency if something were to happen to Barack Obama would “lead the US into a crisis,” a resurfaced letter shows.

NY Post

Don’t underestimate Joe’s ability to fuck things up.

Barack Obama

I can sympathize with those who ticked Biden’s name in the fervent hopes of never seeing Bad Orange Man’s name ever again. But in so doing, they committed dual quintessentially American faults: the political “lesser of two evils,” and the replacement of someone whose words are disagreeable with someone whose actions are disagreeable.

To put the latter differently: there is no doubt that Biden’s presentation or image is “more presidential.” If the presidency were merely a roll to be cast for an actor who must say assigned lines, Joe would win every time. Trump is a bombastic ham by comparison–he improv’s the script far too often, and doesn’t play well with the other actors.

Unfortunately, the presidency also involves decision-making; the holder of that office is supposed to direct the production that they also star in. This is where the choice becomes muddied. Do we keep the bombastic ham and fix him in post-production because, despite his divisive mien, he knows how to see a production through? Or do we pick the career actor who has never seen the backside of a camera in his life, and pray he figures it out while we go along?

Of course, many would disagree that Donald can “see a production through,” and I would give them many concessions to that effect. But objective reality (for those who still believe in it) can at least let us verify that the world has a few more skyscrapers thanks to that bullying bravado, whereas Joe’s greatest accomplishment before his avuncular foot-in-mouth vice presidency was the 1994 crime bill.

On a moral basis, I suspect we could almost call it a draw–self-interested profiteering is rather the point. We could perhaps split hairs about how many people die during the squabbles of big city real estate versus geopolitics, but what’s a few war crimes amongst friends? No, the question was not whether either man was sanctified or whether either man would be good for the country on a long-term basis; it was only about which might keep the cameras running a little longer without forgetting to pay the power bill.

I said of the upcoming election that I thought Trump would win, but that if Joe won he would be afforded a most unique opportunity: being either one of the U.S.’s most well or worst remembered presidents. Trump’s legacy was obviously destined to trend negative in the history books, if only for a decline in “presidential-ness” and “statesmanship” (words and tact, not actions and tactics). Whoever followed this freakshow could conceivably come off like Jesus after a brief season under Lucifer. Needless to say, not only did Joe not seize this opportunity–he did not even discern that it was possible.

Financially, the United States has been squeezing the golden goose like it knows it’s about to stop laying since at least George W. The fact that we still tax this currency of ours at all is rendered a sadistic joke in light of our “just printing” our way out of anything and everything else. Per this status quo, Joe & the DNC are absolutely mad for failing to keep the gravy train rolling. Those stimulus checks should have been rolled right into universal basic income without blinking an eye. “We screwed everybody with the lockdown; we’ve been screwing African Americans out of reparations–here’s some free money forever.” Whether “forever” only means a couple more years is politically irrelevant–an unassailably academic concept to the average American voter. With the knowledge that Joe is no fiscal conservative or conscientious economist, this is plain and simply a squandered easy win.

Next, especially due to illegal immigration, reinvigorated racial tensions, and some nasty intimations about his support for the aforementioned crime bill, the shiny new president could have called for the legalization of drugs–or at least one. Hit the cartels in a place bullets can’t touch, thus deincentivizing their inter-border commerce, overflow the sales-tax coffers for the first time since cigarettes (perhaps to offset that UBI), and maybe even dramatically decrease the domestic abuse of women and children by giving frustrated fathers a recreation that only makes you want to eat Doritos and watch cartoons.

By this point, every adult American would have cash and weed to burn and, if not a full-blown smile, at least a slight grin upon their face. With the reopened economy smokin’ and the people tokin’, there would have been really only one thing left to do. Say some sweet nothings to the camera a few times to the effect of, “hey, look, I get it, you turned to Orange Man out of desperation because you natives saw your standards of living slipping and no breaks on the crazy train; all is forgiven, let’s get back to vaporizing ISIS, making a few of our own cars, and raising these babies in such fashion that they don’t want to kill each other.” Again, too difficult.

I don’t blame Joe Biden for being Joe Biden. It’s the Frog and the Scorpion, or the Dog and the Scorpion–whatever. His nature is what it is–Obama and Osama knew it. The only desirable outcome here was that the American people–or at least those who vote–would have taken the time to discern what the O’s knew and decide that they could take another four years of mean tweets in return for decent economic and military governance.

Instead they got a metaphysical reflection of the prevailing culture: incompetent self-righteousness a la a repressed bad conscience. Joe Biden is exactly the choice that you would expect of the milquetoast American “left” (be they suburban soccer moms or Marxists-about-Starbucks) that screeches the righting of all wrongs in public while indecisively debating the suicide plan in private. As I have said before and will continue to say until the prophecy unfortunately unfolds: the American “left” is not dangerous in-and-of-itself. It is dangerous because it has the capacity to become so unbearably annoying and despicable to the working classes that it brings to this nation the genuinely fascist Far Right that it hallucinated Trump was.

In other words, the only way we could get more Weimar right now is if we severely pissed off our combat vets. Oh…

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